Thursday, June 24, 2010

Your brain on the 11 o'clock

You guys have already heard about my crazy voice mail service - it just makes voice mail so much more fun when the message is scrambled. I've started playing a game where I try to decipher the message before I listen to it and then see how close I get.

I'm easily amused.

On Saturday, I was at a graduation party for Bri's cousin (Becca) and I was sitting at the table and got this phone call, it was a number that I did not recognize but since I started using my cell for a business phone, I've been answering random calls. Well, I was sitting at a table filled with Bri's family so I decided to let this one slide.

When I looked at the voice mail transcript I almost laughed out loud (That's right - a real life, actual LOL) but I refrained (I believe that's - LIMH). The message read: "Your brain on the 11 o'clock"

For some reason the first thing that popped into my head was Devin Scillian from Channel 4 saying: "Tonight an exclusive interview with your brain, That's right learn what your brain might not be telling you tonight on the 11 o'clock news"

The person who left the message actually said: " Well, they don't even answer the phone!"

Not even close to the transcript - but they said it really fast.

Speaking of news anchors, and just so everyone is aware. Bri is totally infatuated with Ben Bailey from Fox 2.

I on the other hand, think that he's s dork - that's right, and if I every see him in public I'll probably go right up to him and........get his autograph for Bri.....and then punch him in his cute little face.

There's no romantic jealousy here, move along people.

T.H. out

Tuesday, June 22, 2010


Let's do some math

(These are all rough estimates)

25% of people can't use new technology when it becomes available, because, it's just toooooo hard to learn and no one will teach them - so they play dumb (some of them, just really are dumb, sorry)

Ok so - that leaves 3/4 of the pie. - out of that 75% - half of them try to use it and fail miserably. I mean they just have no idea what they are doing, but they try and try and try and fail.

So that leaves, um.........roughly 37.5%

Half of that group sneaks by with a limited amount of knowledge, just enough to impress the other 62.5% that don't know what they are doing at all.

That leaves us with 18.75% - Ok half of this group actually kind of knows what they are doing, but for some reason they just don't use it - for whatever reason. Maybe they can't afford to buy it or they just really like the old one, or someone told them not to get the new one, I don't know. This group gets it, they just don't use it.

That leaves 9.375% - The experts, nothing else said. They completely get it 100%.

You can apply this to anything: Computers, Cameras, T.V.'s - any gizmo or gadget you can think up.


Solve this, and you solve the current economic crisis (not really)

Hagaman\Palin 2012

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Sunday, June 6, 2010

Thank You

I find it better to be thankful for things instead of mad - so in my own sarcastic way, here's a list of things that I'm thankful for this week:

1. Thank you (anonymous co-worker) for taking an entire week off and leaving me with a ton of work on the busiest week of the month. (not really his fault - but I'm adding it to the list)

2. Thank you old lady in a 1995 Ford Escort that refuses to drive any faster than 30 MPH at any given time, on any given road.

3. Thank you unobservant driver for hitting my wife's car at 40 MPH at 7 a.m. (on Thursday)

4. Thank you Enterprise car rentals for closing at 1pm

5. Thank you all other car rental companys for not even being open on Saturdays (People still need cars on Saturdays)

6. Thank you 1994 Chevy Blazer for being the most dependable truck that I have ever owned from 1994 to June 3rd, 2010.

7. Thank you lawn for growing so fast.

8. Thank you 2009 Toyota Matrix engineer for making the interior fuse box inaccessible.

9. Thank you AAA for not letting me use my newly renewed membership until Tuesday.

10. Thank you humidity for being yourself

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Dream #4 - 05-26-2010

I was busy at the end of last week and all weekend so here's last Wednesday's dream:

In short, I was trying to steal money out of a pay phone and then the Fed's were after me.

That's it! - I was being chased by men in black suits, black sunglasses and black Chevy Suburbans because I stole a handful of change.